I'm going to do my best to let go of understanding every little thing and see where that takes me for a bit. I can't go stand on top of a post for thirty years or take up residence outside the established economic system (yet), but there are small things to be done and I am more determined than ever to do them. I am rarely the one gushing about having felt a spiritual connection to anything, anyone or any place. The world does not now, nor has it ever really made sense to me on that level. There have often been times when I have wished it was otherwise, but if I'm honest the truth is that I've always been something of an agnostic, even before I knew the word for it. I think the closest I come to feeling religiously moved is during a really good show, listening to a new song or any random Joseph Campbell quote. It's cathartic, gives me permission to let go. It's the only time my analytical brain fades into the background and things take on an emotional tinge around the edges. The last big event in my life to feel like that was last year, when my car was rear-ended and I began to realize what a crutch continuing to go to college was. The big epiphany then was to leap into the handmade unknown and trust that doing what I was good at AND made me happy might not end in a complete disaster. The jury is still out on that one my friends, but the one consolation is the return of a sense of authenticity that I seem to have lost somewhere between here and the end of high school. I wouldn't give that up for anything.
All of that babbling is just a long introduction to my gushing. I just finished The Man Who Quit Money and I feel buoyed, like testifying even. It made me feel like all that Sunday school, church camp and confusion was not for naught. That I didn't have to feel subversive for finding bits of solid advice in the morass of contradictions and justifications such organized religions are prone to. The quick and dirty summary is that it's a bio of Daniel Suelo, a man who gave up on using money in 2000 and the backstory and philosophy behind that. He has a blog and if you Google his name he had his own definition. What you might call his base camp is relatively close to where I grew up; my mom may have even met him growing up in Grand Junction. He is now officially my number one hero and I found myself plotting to track him down in future. At the very least I think I'll knit him some socks. I'm also pretty excited because the book's author gave me something I've been trying to put together ever since I decided it was better to live in the now with intention than to keep putting thing off and work toward a future of...whatever. He gave me the perfect Joseph Campbell quote, one that says it a million times better (and quicker) than I ever can. So I'll leave you with that and a ginormous recommendation for the book. Go! Go!
"A blunder, apparently the merest chance-reveals an unsuspected world, and the individual is drawn into a relationship with forces that are not rightly understood."